Her Last Day Was My Beginning…

?This is a hard post to share and an exciting one all at once. I had a black lab named “Tomato” (yes Tomato- that’s what happens when you let kids name pets ?)

? Anyway! She lived with me, protected me and served me in the toughest decade of my life. Through a horrendous divorce to an incident with domestic abuse where I was hurt badly and several homes I moved to as I tried to find my footing in life.

? I had adopted her from the humane society and trained her to be a service dog. I had hypoglycemia (extremely low blood sugar levels). She was incredibly intelligent so training her to be off leash was easy- she didn’t want to leave my side anyway and I taught her skills like opening a fridge. She was a black lab but had gorgeous flowing hair and the sweetest eyes (took us till the end of her life to figure out what she was a mix of)

? The last 2 years of her life were rough on her but perhaps worse on me as she was my life boat in life. Boyfriend didn’t speak kindly to me? Her and I would hop in the car and go to the mountains ? for r&r time. Family trip to the beach!? Tomato would join us. Creepy guy in a hoodie approaching me? Suddenly that long luscious mane would stand on end and I’d hear a growl as she stared him down.
Then boom! Back to the sweetest dog ever in a second.

Though Tomato was fighting cancer in this pic, with just 3 legs, the ocean made her feel alive! This was her last time at the beach. And Chowder’s first time.

? I began to realize she was my guardian angel. Not just a pet, but a companion, as my heavenly
Father watched me ache and attempt to find my way through life and constantly tripping.

? To fast forward… the day she died is the day I found art. (Again) The day I found my inner 5 year old that always loved creating.

I broke inside when she passed and in a way, I hope I never FIX that break because I am fearless now. I used to be filled with self doubt… but now I live for me. I live to feel like a 5 year old again.
5 year olds are free ? They do and say whatever feels true to them.

? I was so devastated at her loss that I didn’t leave the bed. I was living alone so no one knew how bad it was. Paragraph

? Enter… “CHOWDER”

?‍⚕️ During one of the cancer treatments for “Tomato”, the doctor was giving us some long drawn out explanation as to her imminent death and the medical words for it.

? It hit me hard… a quiet but bold voice. “GET A PUPPY.” I argued with the voice “Are you kidding me? I can’t think of anything else but my dog who needs my 100% attention and love right now!”

? The voice was persistent and then even gave me the reason “You will always compare your future dogs to Tomato and they’ll always let you down if you don’t have Tomato help raise the next dog- to form that bridge that you need”

Off to the humane society I went… and there was little “Chowder”, sweet, tiny and looked like a white rat ?

? He did something others dogs didn’t, that we had introduced Tomato to… he respected her space. He knew she wanted to be left alone and he was mindful of that all the while playing and being rambunctious with the rest of us.

Also, we were used to having such a smart dog that I was worried about getting a real idiot. Lol

?I was able to train chowder to sit on command in the short time we met him having never been trained a thing in his life. To this day he still astonishes me

? Honestly guys I never thought I’d get through that event 1.5 years ago.
But in this past month my grief has been shifting. Less pain and more hope.

? I began what I’ll call a “soft search” for a golden retriever to be my next “Tomato” -never to replace her, but to be a special companion for me.

?Chowder is my walking rainbow. He is my connection to her and his personality though at first I found annoying cause he was SO DANG HAPPY! …And I was so dang sad!
But I see the perfection in it all. Chowders happy demeanor lifted me day after day.

? A few weeks ago I put my feelers out for reputable breeders after a huge search I did of rescues across the U.S. I’m a big rescue person for my dogs and cats but this time my heart needed a very specific breed that I couldn’t find anywhere.

✅ I found a woman who I clicked with – how she raises her dogs, how she breeds them, why, how often and other mental and physical health concerns I had. She checked off every box but unfortunately her pregnant mommy golden had an ultrasound which only showed 3 puppies- all were spoken for… plus there was a waiting list.

? But she and I still bonded and talked and she now follows my Instagram WYNN modern art. page

?Guess who just had a litter of 9! Guess who got a text last night – the anniversary of my dads passing- who got me into being a dog lover in the first place? THIS GIRL!

?I hope you’ll all be part of this amazing time in my and Chowder’s life! We are getting a girl! She was born last week and we will get her approx Feb 22

? PHOTO: Gorgeous daddy

Her Last Day Was My Beginning…

Victoria Wynn

Victoria Wynn describes herself as an introverted people lover. She’s a passionate and heart centered LUXE Fluid Artist and CEO of WYNN modern art. She can be found in Forbes, Fox TV, working with Disney and in women’s magazines globally as she writes and speaks on business, love and art. For Victoria, creating this innovative style of art and using her WYNN modern art. LUXE products like crushed mirror, gemstones and metallic powders is a spiritual experience, a source of meditation and a means to help people manage the stresses of the world.

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