What Makes Me Tick…
At first I had a traditional bio but the more I think about it, the more I see myself as a simple being. I love my family, I love unity, I love helping build confidence in others and some of my favorite conversations have been with animals. 🙂
The story of how I got started: Facebook post – Sept 26, 2018
My modern art was born from not wanting to be on earth anymore a few months ago. Not quite like thoughts of suicide, but I simply asked God to snap his fingers and make me disappear. And I meant it.
When I saw that God wasn’t taking me, I realized I “had” to be around. I asked myself “What would I do if I could do anything?” And what came to me was a form of art I was scared to try. It had chemicals and a style I was new to for which I had lots of angst about. But when you’re at rock bottom, you’ve lost loved ones and on the way to losing cars and a home, suddenly things just don’t matter.
Along with what didn’t matter anymore, came things like fear of rejection, trying to make everyone happy or worrying if I’d look stupid. It was all GONE. As this deep sadness lifted over a course of weeks, it slowly shifted into thoughts like “other’s opinions don’t define my worth nor do I care …but there ARE things worth being around for” …and then joy began to come back into my heart.
I felt joy MOST when I took the scary plunge into this form of art. (Into myself) I began to feel alive. I was losing sleep (still am) not due to stress but due to sheer excitement to get out of bed each day…to express myself on canvas without restraint.
It’s been 7 weeks. 7 long, hard, exciting, thrilling precious weeks.
I am still mourning the loss of my best friend, my dog “Tomato”. She comes to me in dreams all the time. She runs up with all 4 legs giving me love as I ache for hers daily. She was a pet. She was a service dog. She protected me and my house from intruders and abusers. She’d stand in between myself and him. She was everyone’s best friend whether they met her or not.
This past week, since my car got broken into, has been the most financially lucrative week I’ve ever had with art but the healing has also been immense. From delivering commissions and seeing your joy upon arrival to realizing that though I am horrified at losing “Tomato”, this peace I have now in life, where my days are only filled with love from you, a few business logistics and art… well I needed something tragic to happen to remember who I am. (And then act like it)
To discuss co-creating a custom commission perfect for your home or creative space, email me personally at: firstname.lastname@example.org